Friday Thoughts

1. Rest with God & he will give you rest; rest without him & you will find anxiety.

2. Luke 24:46-48. Christ Died; rose from the dead; established his Church. Gospel.

3. Participation in the gospel is the same. We've died with Christ; risen with Christ; are building with Christ.

4. We become partners in the grand discussion when reading books and talking. The discussion is founded & moderated by Scripture alone.

5. The story of Joseph is interrupted by Judah. Makes since.

6. Abortion is a central fight against the gospel. It is a direct affront against man being made in the image of God & therefore worth saving.

7. Have we sacrificed community for missions? These shouldn't be at odds, but so often are.

8. When we agree with the world it isn't for the same reasons as the world.

9. Morality cannot be changed at will.

10. Be relationship rich and experience poor.

A Moment to Write

My professor, Dr. Greenham, spoke well against reincarnation. He said, “We are made to go on.”

Lewis says something similar. Something of how time is an odd thing and that because we view time as odd that this points to our not being made for the temporal but the eternal. That our terms of how, “Time has flown,” or how, “Time has slowed down to a crawl,” are hints at our eternality. We are not made for reflection or the entropy of reliving parts of life, no, we’re made to go on. Now and now and now, we’re made to go on and on and on, but never made to go back to how things once were. God himself will not return us to the Garden, he, rather, will create a city for our dwelling. Lewis does well to say, “Further up and further in.” For indeed this is what we are created for.

Something of this is freeing. Nostalgia seems such a happy place until compared to reality, then we spiral into the hope of how things were, never thinking of how things are let alone how things will be. But if creation longs to be made new (Rom 8) then ought’n we too? Should we not long for the consummation of all things in the enveloping arms of Christ the King? Yet here Lewis’ voice plays in my ears once more, “News from a country you’ve never visited… echoes of a tune you’ve not heard… the scent of a flower I’ve never smelled.” Indeed our longing for completion is evident in our nostalgia, but we cannot go backward to gain it, we must go on.

I’m finding more and more that I truly only know two things, that I am a great sinner and Jesus is a greater Savior (as Newton would say it). My feelings betray me. My heart is deceitful. My mind is a labyrinth of these's and those's, this’s and that’s. Even reality holds little to know, because I’m certain that just behind it’s frail curtain a war rages - a war of cherubim and seraphim fighting devils and demons - of light defeating darkness for the Dawn has come. There is comfort in seeing my ignorance.

Andrew Peterson has a song that has been capturing me, “Carry the Fire.” He sings, “We dream at night of city descending with the Son in the middle and a peace unending… Where joy writes the song and the innocent sing them…” The more I learn, the more those same two things are all I know. In some form or fashion all things are tied to the sinfulness of my soul and Christ’s redemption.

Surety

Have you ever felt like God was tangibly around you? Like if you were to reach out and grasp the air something invisible would be there to grip your hand back? Or what about knowing for certain the purpose for your being was to do a certain thing? Like if the calling or essence or epitome of your life was to _________. Have you ever felt either of those feelings, rather knowings?

I know these are big abstractions about the Christian life; one’s calling and feeling the closeness of God. I know many folks don’t “feel” God move or even think to terribly much about him, and that when they do think of him it’s a him who looks more like them than Him.

But truth has always moved through the ages. There have always been those who take up the banner of divine revelation and say with their blood, sweat and very lives,“Let good and kindred go, this mortal life also, the body they may kill, but God’s truth abides still!” That death meant life and life meant Christ; that hope shattered chains and set prisoners free; that grace burned through hatred and love prevailed in darkness.

There are those in this time, in this generation who stand strong rooted in the Scriptures that God’s truth still lives, breathes and will fell the deviations of the devil. Yes, they will loose their friends and their family. Yes, they will walk away from all to follow the call. Yes, they will feel the tangible nature of the Almighty and the hold of the Comforter and the embrace of nail scared hands. Yes, they will walk as sheep among wolves. Yes, they will shut the mouths of lions and put foreign armies to flight and be sawn in two and live destitute of whom the world is not worthy. And yes, yes, it will be worth it all.

It will be worth it all to hear the saints and angels sing, “Holy, holy, holy is the LORD God almighty who was and is and is to come.” It will be worth it to hear the proclamation over all eternity, “Well done my good and faithful servant.”

Yet, we must stand firm and be watchful and believe with all of every breath of God-gifted life the gospel of Jesus, that he has become our sin and we have become, by divine decree, his prefect righteousness. Indeed we are the recipients of grace upon grace upon grace.

But beware for, “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’” (Matt 7:21-23)

Be sure of your belief. Be more than sure of the gospel. And be absolutely sure that Jesus is your God-give hope, that Jesus is your Surety.

The Title Explained: Why my blog is called what it's called.

I've never really explained why my blog is called "Aspiring Spurgeon," which, I guess, is a huge over sight in the realm of the blogger types. So I'd like to take a couple posts and explain the name. First, however, I want to give you a quote from one of his sermons, then later we can jump into why a blog has a certain name.

"... The more vile a man is, the more eagerly I invite him to believe in Jesus. A sense of sin is all we have to look for as ministers. We preach to sinners; & let us know that a man will take the title of sinner to himself, & we then say to him, 'Look to Christ and you shall be saved.' 'Look,' this is all he demands of you, & even this he gives you. If you look to yourself you are damned; you are a vile miscreant, filled with loathsomeness, corrupt and corrupting others. But look here - see that man hanging on the cross? Do you behold his agonized head dropping meekly down upon his breast? Do you see his hands pierced and rent, & his blest feet, supporting the weight of his own frame, rent well-nigh in two with the cruel nails? Sinner! Do you hear him shriek, 'Eloi, Eloi, lama sabbacthani?' Do you hear him cry, 'It is finished?' Do you mark his head hang down in death? See you that side pierced with the spear, & the body taken from the cross? O, come you here! Those hands were nailed for you; those feet gushed gore for you; that side was opened wide for you; and you want to know how you can find mercy, there it is, 'Look!' 'Look unto me!' Look no longer to Moses. Look no longer to Sinai. Come you here and look to Calvary, to Calvary's victim, and to Joseph's grave. And look yonder to the man who near the throne sits with his Father crowned with light and immortality. 'Look, sinner,' he says this morning to you, 'Look unto me and be saved.' It is in this way God teaches that there is none besides him; because he makes us look entirely to him, and utterly away from ourselves."

I bet you're beginning to see why this preacher from one hundred years ago has made an impact on me. It's exciting to get to tell you how God used this man in my life so long after his death. 

We'll Remember

“When shadows fall on us we will not fear we will remember.”

We’ll remember the call; we’ll remember the light at the end of our dark night. We’ll remember the cross; we’ll remember the resurrection and our subsequent salvation. We’ll remember the cost; we’ll remember blood, the sweat, the tears, we’ll remember our fear now relieved.

We’ll remember the end of death and the first breath of life; we’ll remember the beginning of our sanctification and the end of our damnation; we’ll remember the beginning of all of forever of the life we’ll live with God; we’ll remember the first glimpses of the glory of the King who saved us and bought us with himself – for himself.

We’ll remember the God who did not delay but sent his own Son to die for us because he loved us with a great love – so great that it spelled then end of the end and the death of the grave. We’ll remember that our help comes from the LORD the maker of heaven and hell and all that is between them.

We’ll remember that neither death nor life nor things present nor things to come, nor angels, demons, heaven, hell, Satan himself and all the hosts of the man cannot separate us from the love of our God!

We’ll remember that all we are is nothing apart from him our everything. We’ll remember that we have been bought with a price and that it’s no longer we who live but Christ who lives in us. We’ll remember each breath is grace and each second is a second chance, that each life encountered is a life to be spoken into, that each life is a soul and each soul is eternal and each eternity can be impacted for the King by his poor ambassadors.

We’ll remember the cost of the cross and the call of the King. We’ll remember each step is faith and all faith is God’s. We’ll remember that what we deserve we do not get and what we do not get is what we deserve. We’ll remember that the closest to hell we’ll ever get is this life – this life with all its raindrops and smiles, all its baby laughter and nephew hugs, all is kisses of spouses and providences of God. We’ll remember the beginning, middle and end of all of everything in our small little lives is the cross of Christ, the empty tomb, and the love of God for us.

Two Weeks of Thinking

It’s been a little over two weeks since all my responsibilities at the church ended. Sure the announcement was just this last Sunday but it was a scheduled announcement so there was a bit of waiting around not being able to say anything for a while. In other words, I’ve had a bit of time to digest this stuff – to think about what should be said, how to say it, and what’s the safe way to communicate the problems encountered…

In the end it’s just fine to talk about weaknesses; to discuss the realities of depression – the need for a medication and a counselor; to talk about the constant wear of attempting to function in an area of gifting you’re not gifted with; to be real about the pain of singleness in the ministry and the damned desire to be helped and cared for.

In the end it’s safe to honestly open up about the constant drudge of being barely able to have the faith of salvation let alone the apparently necessary overt faith of a pastor, to say that I can’t run off someone else’s passion any longer.

In the end it’s okay to tell people that the only way it was possible to fall asleep at night was to try to remember what it was like in another land, when war raged all around; to listen to mix CD’s from years ago while clinging to your Bible and weeping for want of a returned hope.

In the end… In the end it’ll be right to say that the darkness was necessary and the sun shown more brightly; to remember the sting of losses and know them for what they really are - bits that had to be pruned.

Sure there’s a plan and a hope for the future, but the plan can’t be the hope. Yes, there’s a past full of wishes for something different, but wishes don’t change the past just like my future shouldn’t change my hope.

So when the time comes to bid the Shadowland goodbye, it shouldn’t be from desires for a different life or from the failed dreams I once held, but it should be from the standpoint of knowing my hope-filled-anchor to be hidden with Christ on high and thus my hope is my future and my present and my past – that is to mean in weakness, and drudgery, and fear cling to Him who does cling to you.

Understanding Failure

Sunday's sermon was two things for me: 1) it was refreshing to hear things that I love preached; 2) it was hurtful to see – in my own life – my failure to be those things.

First, it was refreshing because as single men we need to learn to grow up and be responsible. To take hold of our decisions and be able to say, “Yes, I did that,” and if it was wrong to take the right blame and be repentant in our confession of failing; and if it was right to not gloat it over the heads of others.

To learn what it is to pay bills and keep and manage a budget while working a job and learning about who you are in God. Aiming to see Him glorified in all of life in work and responsibility as well as fun and relaxing. Then, by the grace of God someday bring and woman into that, to learn to love her well – in a God-fearing, God-trusting, God-exalting, Jesus-clinging way.

Second, this hurt like a ton of bricks dropped on my heart. “Passive” is scary word to me; I hate passivity – yet that is exactly what I’ve been in almost every dating relationship I’ve been in. Sure it’s one thing to take the lead when the person on the other side of the phone or the other side of your cup of coffee doesn’t know you deeply, but it’s something else entirely to tell a woman, “You’re not trusting Christ the way you need to be," or, "I've sinned against you by making you my idol."

The gut-wrenching reality is I’m not trusting Christ the way I need to be. Rather than knowing my mantra  (“My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness”) to be true, I look into her eyes and I’m more worried about making her happy than seeing God 1) honored, 2) glorified, 3) followed.

So what’s a single man to do? (Time to speak to myself in a third person kind of way.) He should aim at being so committed to God that a girl cannot and will not sway him from seeing God glorified in his life. He should be believing the gospel for all his passed failures and future screw ups. He should be praying, “Make me a better man, one to love my God, one to follow him, one to be in Jesus. To – one day – love a woman, to raise children, to be a leader-follower. Help me be a better man; to leave my wants for hers, to leave my needs for hers, to look to you for comfort and peace. Make me a better man for your glory.”

A Breath

Imagine something with me.

You’re in a cave, dark (pitch-black), cool, and eerie. You know it’s a tomb, you know it contains a body; you know it contains what remains of the physical body of Jesus.

You saw him just a few days ago, hanging from a cross, looking more like a hunk of meat than a man. You heard him give up his spirit; you saw the spear go in and out of his side. You know he’s dead.

The silence of the tomb is overwhelming. So quiet it hurts your ears, so still, so full of death.

Then it happens. So small, yet so profound against the prevailing silence, a breath was just taken! There is life in that ‘dead body.’ Soft and steady breathing.

Jesus’ death was loud, it was violent, and it was gruesome and bloody and seen by many. The Curtain was torn in two, an earthquake happened; there was darkness at noontime. Shouts and hate and the final words of Christ, “It is finished,” the proclamation of proclamations.

Jesus’ resurrection was quiet, a breath in the dark. But what it accomplished is more resounding than the darkness or the earthquake or the shouts, “Jesus took in that breath and shattered all death with his life.”

Imagining forth to the peace we have in him, his breathing alone in the tomb secures our hope.

Jesus’ first breath in the dark of the tomb will resound for all eternity.